It took me 17 years to get 3,000 hits, but I did it in one afternoon on the golf course. 
--Hank Aaron

Years ago we discovered the exact point, the dead center of middle age. It occurs when you are too young to take up golf and too old to rush up to the net. 
--Franklin P. Adams

Love and putting are mysteries for the philosopher to solve. Both subjects are beyond golfers. 
--Tommy Armour

Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air. 
--Jack Benny

Putting allows the touchy golfer two to four opportunities to blow a gasket in the short space of two to forty feet. 
--Tommy Bolt

Retire to what? I'm a golfer and a fisherman. I've got no place to retire to. 
--Julius Boros

I regard golf as an expensive way of playing marbles. 
--G. K. Chesterton

How has retirement affected my golf game? A lot more people beat me now. 
--Dwight D. Eisenhower

Golf and sex are about the only things you can enjoy without being good at. 
--Jimmy Demaret

They say golf is like life, but don't believe them. golf is more complicated than that. 
--Gardner Dickinson

Golf is an ideal diversion but a ruinous disease. 
--B. C. Forbes

I'll know I'm getting better at golf because I'm hitting fewer spectators. 
--Gerald Ford

The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course. 
--Billy Graham

Reverse every natural instinct and do the opposite of what you are inclined to do, and you will probably come very close to having a perfect golf swing. 
--Ben Hogan

Go play golf. Go to the golf course. Hit the ball. Find the ball. Repeat until the ball is in the hole. Have fun. The end. 
--Chuck Hogan

If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf.
--Bob Hope

If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball. 
--Jack Lemmon

I play [golf] in the low 80s. If it's any hotter than that, I won't play. 
--Joe E. Lewis

They say "practice" makes perfect " Of course, it doesn't. For the vast majority of golfers it merely consolidates imperfection. 
--Henry Longhurst

If I had my way, no man guilty of golf would be eligible to any office of trust under the United States. 
--H. L. Mencken

Golf has probably kept more people sane than psychiatrists have. 
--Harvey Penick

Golf is good for the soul. You get so mad at yourself you forget to hate your enemies. 
--Will Rogers

Income Tax has made more liars out of the American people than Golf.
--Will Rogers

The people who gave us golf and called it a game are the same people who gave us bag pipes and called it music. 
-- TV "Silk Stalkings"

I'm a golfaholic. And all the counseling in the world wouldn't help me. 
--Lee Trevino

It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling. 
--Mark Twain

Don't play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty. 
--Harry Vardon

The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf. It's almost a law. 
--H. G. Wells

Golf is a game in which one endeavors to control a ball with implements ill adapted for the purpose. 
--Woodrow Wilson

Sudden success in golf is like the sudden acquisition of wealth. It is apt to unsettle and deteriorate the character. 
--P. G. Wodehouse

Golf is a day spent in a round of strenuous idleness. 
--William Wordsworth